Lonely...I'm So Lonely...I have nobody to call my own.

Ok...so that title may be a little drastic but in a way it is the truth!!!

I am going through a time that I can truly say I am lonely. Don't get me wrong...9 times out of 10 I am surrounded by people in someway.

To be totally honest right now is when it has started being harder because I am 1 of a handful of my friends that is still single...and of those handful of friends only 2others live here in Little Rock and I don't get to see them as much as I would like. I still go out with some of my engaged/married friends but it is hard always being the 3rd or 5th or whatever numbered wheel when I am out with a group of friends. I am usually ok when I am out with friends but when it is time for me to go home it is kind of hard to be alone all of the time. You may say..."Amanda you are living with your mom right now." Yes, that is the case for the next month or so. But, having a parent, grandparent, sibling or roommate there is different than having a lifelong companion.

I cannot even begin to put into words how much I want to find someone to marry and eventually start a family. I watch my brother and sister-in-law and some of my friends and see how much they love each other and how much fun they have being parents...and I know it is not all fun and games...I know it takes ALOT of work. But marriage is something that I have wanted all of my life and that desire has only increased as I have gotten older.

I know that God has a man that He has hand-picked for only me...but sometimes I want to yell "GOD WHEN IS IT GOING TO BE MY TURN?" I want to have someone there to serve...I want to have someone there to walk the long road of life with...I want someone to come beside me and minister together.

I spend a lot of time praying that God would help me be content in my singleness...that I would find comfort in Him alone. I don't want me being single to become a burden to me...I want to use it to the fullest.

Please pray that God would make Himself known to me in new ways and that He would use this time to make me the woman that He would have me be...that way I will be able to be the kind of wife that a man needs.